Grovel of the Week
Or should that be 'weak'?
Jakartass tries to be all things to all men. Oh, and women, children and similar sentient beings.
So discovering that my blog, albeit otherwise rated 'excellent' and 'ranked is ranked 35 in the world' by this site, discriminates against folk who are disadvantaged has got me worried.
Apparently I've transgressed the UK Disabilities Discrimination Act which makes most British websites unlawful from the 1st October 2004. The Act makes it "unlawful for a service provider to discriminate against a disabled person by refusing to provide any service which it provides to members of the public", specifically mentioning websites.
A formal investigation in April 2004 found 81% failed to provide even the most basic access to disabled users. Companies face the threat of legal action and unlimited compensation payments if they fail to comply with new legislation.
Oh dear, I didn't mean to. Honest.
I don't make fun of those different from me, although being a westerner of Fijian stature I do tend to look down on Indonesians. And I must admit that watching Our Kid last night in Snow White and the (only) Six Dwarves did lead me to comment that they were a bit short.
With chronic myopia I deliberately set quite a large text size. My readers are free to change this in View up on the toolbar. As a one-finger typist I suppose I am also digitally disadvantaged, but that shouldn't worry anyone. Jakartass is only interactive in the sense that I'm pleased when someone reads my musings. You don't actually have to do anything else, although comments are always welcome.
Whatever, I will continue to atone for my supposed sins by giving you access to tools that will enhance your reading pleasure and enable you in your daily dose of Jakartass.
Spending a penny
Do you struggle to pee in the toilet bowl at night? Help is at hand. Actually it isn't, because with Johnny Light you don't even have to switch on the bathroom/restroom/toilet/lavatory light.
What has been nice about the Johnny Light is those middle of the night trips to the John no longer require me to turn on the overhead light. This was always a dilemma, do you turn on the light and temporarily blind yourself. Or, do you just aim and shoot and hope for the best. Now, all I have to do is lift the lid and I get a subtle green glow that allows better vision without blinding me or waking me up entirely. Your product was worth every penny.
Those of you who were disadvantaged by my post on Wednesday about wiping the detritus from the nether region could well be interested in this remarkable aid.
SelfWipe is a bathroom toileting aid for those with difficulties cleaning after using the toilet. The SelfWipe extends reach and is regarded as the best product of it's (sic) kind. Our revolutionary design is comfortable because it is rounded and smooth.
The toilet tissue is held tightly and released easily with the push of a button. The SelfWipe is unsurpassed by any other extended reach bathroom aid, making your toileting cleaner, more efficient, and with a greater degree of hygiene.
This toileting aid is such a tremendous aid to independent living that it is the ideal choice for those with a myriad of physical disabilities and mobility challenges.
Sitting at a computer all day can be a pain in the neck .. and the back and the wrists. The human anatomy just wasn't designed to sit in a chair all day whacking away at a keyboard. We need support and support is what you get with the Redundant Recumbent computer workstation. This thing fully adjusts to every type of body known to the human race and it looks sooo comfy.
(via J-Walk)
Diamond Geezer has discovered that his blogging is damaging the ozone layer. He promises to plant a tree once every three years. Given that he gets three times as many daily hits as me, I hereby vow to plant a tree in 2014.
CULTURE VULTURE
James and the Giant Peach, The Twits, Matilda. Who hasn't been delighted as a story-telling parent or sleep-avoiding child by these Roald Dahl magical tales with enchanting illustrations by Quentin Blake?
So news that the Roald Dahl Museum opened yesterday is doubly welcome.
And Our Kid and I are really looking forward to the July release of Charlie and the Chocolate Factory starring Johnny Depp as Willy Wonka.
Who else?
Stop Press
There may be a Jakartass reader in Madison, Wisconsin. If so, this message is just for you.
Today is your only chance in about four years to see the Titan Arum flowering.
Those of you unable to get close enough to smell the stinkiest plant on the Earth, a 'native' of Indonesia, can watch the video-stream from the comfort of your Redundant Recumbent.
